Don't Expect The Perfect Holiday

Thanksgiving is NEXT WEEK?! I haven’t even carved the turkey yet and I’m already stressed! How will I get it all done? When will I have time to shop? I’m already worried how I will make this the best Christmas ever! There are so many things for us to do and see it just gets so overwhelming!

I decided this week I need to put on the breaks. I’ve had a crazy week with two sick kids, one dental procedure and zero time to prep. In all this madness I’m still obsessing about perfection when I’m living in total chaos! I need to put aside all the to-do lists, sit away from the kids and listen to my own needs. (Yes, I know how hard that is!). I have to ask myself what is the most simplistic need for my family to enjoy the holiday season? Do we need perfect cookies? Perfect gifts? Do we need perfect cards and attend every party? Do we even need to eat a turkey?

When I really think about it, I don’t need to over work myself to make anything perfect. My kids won’t remember perfection. They won’t even know how many hours a night I spend crafting the perfect family cards, pouring over turkey day recipes, or wrapping the gifts with crisp efficiency.  What they will remember is the warmth. The warmth I wrap around each of them when I open my heart and give my love generously. The love I am teaching them to give to the world around us.

So, what am I going to let go of this year? The pressure I put on myself to make the holiday perfect. My husband and I have carefully selected the number of activities we want to participate in. We are letting go of rushing to several events in one day and choosing to spend more time at home cozied up in front of the TV.  Santa is a cool dude, but we don’t need to see him fourteen different places to know it’s Christmas. So, we will do our traditional one photo with Santa. I plan to spend time baking and connecting in the kitchen; and snuggling up every night with a new Christmas book. My kids are getting one dream gift each and the rest will be things they need.

This year I am scaling back from the over-doing and letting my kids excitement lead me into the holiday season. I only have a short time in their childhood to form the memories they will carry through the rest of their lives. The last thing I want for them to remember is my stress for perfection. I want them to remember mommy made things feel like magic because she was right there enjoying the moment.

The season of giving and of gifts is short lived. But, it is the perfect time to let go of the pressure to make every detail perfect. Not every moment has to be perfect for it to be memorable. It’s OK to say NO to material things, it’s OK to say NO to rushing around and it is perfectly OK to say YES to letting go of big expectations for how we celebrate our holidays.



The Whatever Mom is a full time wife and twin mama living on coffee and wine. She enjoys the pure rush of cleaning the potty between loads of laundry. It is her dream that moms everywhere accept and embrace the Whatever Mom philosophy which can be found here.

Find more from Roxanne at Hudson Valley Parent and at Masshole Mommy